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Collaborative Divorce in Riverside County, California
The Collaborative Divorce approach was developed some 25 years ago as attorneys and other professionals saw the need to expand divorce resources and change the process of the traditional adversarial divorce experience. It is gaining recognition quickly and today it is being practiced in all fifty States and several countries, including Canada and England.
Collaborative Process is an "awakened" approach that goes beyond typical mediation. It is uniquely creative and versatile, tailored to meet the needs of each couple. Without going to court, spouses resolve their differences in a respectful, amicable, and constructive manner that allows them to determine the best outcome for their family. The Collaborative experience supports negotiating agreements regarding all the important issues that arise in a divorce or the break up of non-marital relationship including custody and visitation, support, and property division. A working relationship can be preserved with your spouse or partner, and you are much more likely to reach agreements that are sensitive and mutually beneficial through the guidance of the professionals who facilitate the process. You can intelligently evaluate finances and family businesses, and partners who are not accustomed to managing their own affairs are trained and encouraged to become self-sufficient sooner.
California expressly sanctions Collaborative Divorce. Family Section 2013 states: "(a) If a written agreement is entered into by the parties, the parties may utilize a collaborative law process to resolve any matter governed by this code over which the court is granted jurisdiction pursuant to Section 2000. (b) 'Collaborative law process' means the process in which the parties and any professionals engaged by the parties to assist them agree in writing to use their best efforts and to make a good faith attempt to resolve disputes related to the family law matters as referenced in subdivision (a) on an agreed basis without resorting to adversary judicial intervention." To illustrate what a cutting edge innovation this is, Family Code section 2013 was only added by the California legislature in 2007. Notice the legislative recognition that judicial intervention is inherently adversarial.
Why a Collaborative Divorce?
A contested divorce in family court tends to be detrimental to you and to the children of divorce, in every way. You have no control over the process; judges are too busy to understand your needs; your dispute is open to the public and the hostile things that parties say about and to each other during adversarial litigation, are public record, accessible to friends, employers and potential employers, co-workers, and one day your children, forever. The perpetuation of bitterness is well served and self-inflicted.
People in divorce who have gone through the collaborative process report the following things that they liked about it:
- A process which would better focus on the concerns most important to the client
- A less confrontational and less adversarial process
- A more respectful process
- More control over the outcome
- Professionals who would work more as a team to help clients solve problems
- A process that better provided sufficient time to address all concerns
- A process better suited to the client
Collaborative divorce will not work for every couple because it requires each person to approach the divorce process with maturity and the willingness to work towards a mutually beneficial outcome - a win/win for both adults and their children as well. In our opinion it is always preferable to the court supervised process. The emotional destructiveness of courtroom divorce is great, and it is more expensive emotionally and financially, as well as time consuming than the collaborative alternative.
Who Participates in the Collaborative Process?
There are different templates for collaborative divorce depending upon a family's needs and the particular issues involved. For instance, outside mediators can be used if this is appropriate but usually the specially trained lawyers function in that capacity.
California Collaborative Lawyers are not specifically regulated, certified, or credentialed. Collaborative Attorneys are required according to the terms by which they become members in collaborative associations (IACP) to have specific training in collaborative law practices. This is because 95% of attorneys have conditioned attitudes towards divorce practice that are so entrenched and adversarial that they cannot perform collaboratively without retraining.
Because resolving cases collaboratively depends on experts whose roles are often more important than those that lawyers customarily fill, a unique attribute of Collaborative Law is the creation of the Collaborative Team. In order for this type of dispute resolution to be successful, the professional members of the Team must know and trust each other, and the more experience on successive cases that the Team accumulates together the more efficient the Team becomes, the more efficient the outcomes for clients.
Collaborative Teams are typically comprised of the following participants: The parties, a lawyer for each spouse/partner, a divorce "coach" for each party (a licensed therapist or psychologist), and a neutral financial professional who works for both parties. Divorce coaches interact with the clients directly to support healthy communication and dialogue, redirect emotional reactions, work through impasses when they occur and help clients achieve their highest values and hopes for a successful divorce or domestic partnership dissolution. Coaches are the same gender their client. The financial expert is a licensed CPA, CFP or CDFA with training in forensics, whose job description includes everything from cash flow analysis, financial needs of the family going forward, determining child and spousal support (as well as the ability to pay), and establishing budgets as one household transitions into two. If needed, attention is given to training a spouse or partner how to handle finances where they might not have understood or controlled them during the marriage. This balances power during the process, and supports skills in managing one's separate finances into the future. Experts in vocational rehabilitation may also be utilized to assist party's in identifying reeducation needs, or acquiring new skills, that will assist that person in becoming independent.
In cases involving kids, the parties may select a joint therapist with experience in developmental issues to be the voice of the children. Many divorcing, warring parents proclaim their only interest is the minor children when the minors' needs and feelings are never even assessed! Collaborative process integrates children into the dissolution experience, and radically changes their experience of your break up. It facilitates cooperation between parents, fosters healthier children of divorce, and improved relationships between the parents and the children for years to come. It models appropriate behavior for children in their future adults in relationship.
What Is the Collaborative Process?
The Collaborative Process includes team meetings to identify the goals and desire outcomes of the couple, meeting with coaches to work on communication and co-parenting issues/and custody sharing, and emotional issues which left unaddressed might cause disputes to erupt. Meetings occur with the financial professional to help unravel the couple's finances, consider how to divide assets and debts, determine expenses and budgets, and negotiate support. The Team provides an orderly and respectful framework for dispute resolution on an item by item basis.
Everything that happens in the Collaborative Process is privileged. Nothing said and no information gained can be used if either party opts out of the process. This creates a container of confidentiality that helps maintain the integrity of the collaborative process. It also establishes a disincentive to the parties to "blow up" the process because neither party can gain an advantage outside of collaborative practice by what was learned or occurred within it.
Once the parties have agreed upon a Collaborative Divorce the team members meet to define the goals of the process among the group, by which every player dedicates themselves to the whole outcome. Deadlines are set so that the case stays on track to resolution, unlike court supervised divorce where cases are not managed. In Family Court there is no meaningful supervision of the process. Judges are overworked, and the system is built for inefficiency. The Family Court experience reflects the wiliness of the parties to move the case along. Often one party sees stalling and roadblocking as in their self interest. The Collaborative approach does not permit this attitude to develop, and issues are addressed in real time as they arise.
All information that is needed is exchanged without formal "discovery" which invariably become an expensive battleground in court litigation. The financial team member ensures that all back up data is located, exchange between the parties, and evaluated. There can be no ambushes and there can be no surprises. If a party seeks to obstruct disclosure and cannot be convinced by their coach or their attorney to modify that behavior, the process ends and the parties proceed to litigation. Usually, the difficult party can be guided back to the ethical path.
The changing and future needs of the parties and children are carefully analyzed, and reasonable timelines for achieving financial independence over time are road mapped. Property division scenarios are considered, along with tax consequences. Using the money that once supported one household and now stretching it to support two can be challenging, but in collaborative divorce income and expenses and support can be structured in a way that is sustainable. The number of years remaining to retirement, and wealth management generally, can be planned for and both parties can obtain invaluable tools to budget their affairs and consider the evolving needs of children.
Binding agreements are vetted and finalized and these are submitted to the Family Court for approval and filed as Judgments. The final Judgment is the only public record of the divorce. This provides a method of dealing with future issues as they arise, and if the Court is asked to enforce the agreement in years to come (if the parties do not return to the collaborative process) the Courts have an explanation of what the parties' expectations are. Before this occurs, every effort will be made to help the couple resolve future issues within the collaborative process and so see going to court as a last resort. If this is unsuccessful, it will permit family courts to protect the spirit of the collaborative agreement. Flexibility is written into the parties' agreement. In the end, the parties know they have treated each other fairly and respectfully, without further wounding and emotional bloodshed, which is a healthy prescription for the futures of all affected!
Consider a Collaborative Outcome!
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